Mi-jeng hated her grandfather even though she hadn't met him since she was a baby. She only thought of him during Je-sa, the holiday ansesoral worship that happend once or twice a year.
She watched her father bow in front of his photo sitting on a table of food. Her father poured ceremonial rice wine out of his cup. Her Uncle filled it. Her father made three circles and then bowed again. Her cousin was next. Mi-jeng looked back at the TV and turned the chanel. Her phone buzzed once. She picked it up and read the message.
"Let got out tonight!," it said. "Happy Chusok. I love you!" it said in English.
Mi-jeng flipped open her phone and tapped out a message. She tossed the phone behind her onto the bed. Her cousin was finishing his bow. On TV was a documentary. Something about fishermen not having any more fish to catch because of Chinese and Japanese vessels overfishing. She changed the channel. Her phone buzzed again.
"Lets go to the nightclub in Seomyeon. Meet me at the subway at 8 p.m.," it said in Korean.
"Okay. See you tonight," Mi-jeng wrote.
"OK!" said the reply, in English again.
She hated when her friends sent messaged in English. For that matter, she hated English. She'd made a concentrated effort to avoid English throughout high school and during her stint as a technical college student.
It was her oldest brother's turn to bow. He got on his knees and accepted the cup of rice wine from her father's brother.
She noted that this je-sa was with all of her father's brothers. That is, the brothers from both mothers. This happened every two or three years. Then they'd start fighting again and then je-sa would just be with her father's full brother again.
That was fine with her. It was shorter. Her mom had to cook less food. It was less everything, actually.
Me-jeng's grandmother started to snore behind her. She looked at her. She looked dead. Her body wasn't just resting, she thought, it looked like it could deflate and bury itself in the bed.
What a hard life she's had. She should die peacefully. Mijeng had never spoken directly to her grandmother about her life. It was prudent to ask, however non-traditional Mi-jeng was in other ways. Everything she knew her mother had told her. And her mother had found out from Mi-jeng's father's sisters. And even they didn't tell her everything directly. Much of it was shrouded in mystery.
But there was no mystery about the fact that her grandmother had married twice. A bonafied rarity in Korea.
Mi-jeng stood up and turned the chanel. Her back hurt. Her body hurt. She soon realized it hurt more to stand up. Her body felt raw. She tried to stretch her legs, circling her knees around twice. They cracked. She sat back down. Then lay on her back. Her grandmother was still snoring behind her. People muttered in the other room. Her mother was scrambling about in the kitchen.
She had very little emotion about her grandmother. She never hugged her or even spoke to her for the most part. Usually she stood there while her Dad spoke about her and her grandmother nodded and grunted. But her memory was bad. That, added to the fact she didn't give two shits about Mi-jeng didn't add up to much of a relationship.
"Mi-jeng finished her schooling and now she's selling clothes at her friend's store in Seomyeon."
Her grandmother nodded slowly, saying nothing. Her indifference wouldn't have mattered had she not just cracked a toothless smile upon hearing about her oldest brother's new job in a factory in Sasang. "There are a lot of factories in Sasang," she nodded approvingly. "You need to save some money. Then you can get married soon." Her brother had blushed a little and nodded, looking at the floor. "You need to find a good wife to take care of you," she added.
Her grandmother's indifference toward her was nothing new. Like many things, she was numb to it. Still, she wondered what was in her Grandmother's head. What did she think about? Did she think at all? What was her feeling about her first husband who died? And how did she feel when she was forced to marry again? To marry a man because his other wife couldn't bear a son. Was she loved by him? Ever? Was she the prefered one? Did she sleep with him or did the other wife?
These questions that had surfaced in Mi-jeng's mind so many times. They were back at this moment. She leaned back into the bed her grandmother slept on. Her father, uncles, cousins and brothers rolled up the mat they had bowed upon and cleared space for the table. Her mother brought out the table and two of the other wives followed with plates of food. The men stood in small circles and ate raw chestnuts. Her grandma stopped snoring and turned on her side. Mi-jeng turned around and her grandma's eyes were wide open. They started at each other.
"Me-jeng!" yelled her mother.
"Me-jeng, come help me," she yelled again.
"Go help your mother," her grandmother said.
Eventually her grandmother joined the other women in the kitchen. The women crowded around a small table and ate bits of tempura fried shrimp and squid. Sqatting down in such a way reminded Mi-jeng of her pain. She had to go to the bathroom but that pain was as great as any. Her grandmother sat against the wall and grinded her teeth, as usual. The men sat in the other room, a little high from the rice wine and talking boistriously. The women were more quiet.
After finishing eating they washed dishes. Her Grandmother remained seated on the floor and stared into nothingness. No one spoke to her.
Soon it was finished. Mi-jeng's mothing cleared off the men's table and Mi-jeng followed, folding up the table they'd been eating on. Soon the men were in the hallway, slipping on their shoes. Talking about the directions to the next place. Her Uncle's house in Gupo. Mi-jeng's mind flashed to the day before. The strange, quiet man who'd said nothing, thrown her on the bed, and was ordering her to leave 5 minutes later. She pushed this image out of her mind, but as her Uncle recounted the directions to his home, she couldn't help realizing they were similar to the directions she'd received the day before. But as her Uncle left she realized that if she saw him on the street she'd hardly recognize him. And he wouldn't possibly know who she was.
When Mi-jeng went back to the TV room her phone was buzzing. She looked at the number. It was the Da-bang owner, Miss Ja. She had called twice and was calling again.
"Hello?"
"What are you doing?" said Ja.
"We just finished Je-sa."
"Is your duty finished?"
"Yes."
"I need you to go out on a call."
"Today?"
"I don't know. I think we have to go to the next house."
"Don't bullshit me. This is a good job. Two customers. They live near to you."
Mi-jeng paused. She didn't feel like going out on a call. She was dressed in rags and had barely any mankeup on. "Where is it?"
"It's in Miliak. In the Lotte Castle apartments"
It wasn't that close, she thought. About six stops on the subway. But it was in a very rich area. Me-jeng shifted her weight, mostly to see if she could stand the pain of two customers.
"Huh?" said Ja, wating for an answer. "Huh?"
"What about the coffee?" Mi-jeng said, quietly, closing the door.
"Fuck the coffee! They said they have drinks. Just take the subway or a taxi. I'll pay you for the taxi tomorrow."
Mi-jeng contemplated. She looked around the room. She wasn't meeting her friend until later. She had more than six hours. The money could be very good. She could use a new phone. Between yesterday and today the phone would be paid for.
"Ok. I'll go."
"Good. Hurry up. I'll text message you the apartment number. Hurry up."
Me-jeng hung up the phone. She needed to take another shower, she thought. She opened the door and her grandmother was standing there. In the doorway. They looked at each other. It was another awkward pause. She looked in her Grandmother's eyes. Nothing. No hate. No love. No dispair. No joy. Mi-jeng gave a slight bow and moved past her grandmother. She ran to the bathroom to wash. Her Grandmother watched her until the door had closed.
When she ran out of the bathroom her grandma was still in the area. As if she hadn't stopped watching the door. What is she thinking? Does she know where I'm going? That's impossible. Mi-jeng ran from room to room. Looking for her phone. Looking for her shoes. Looking for her makeup bag. She put on tight shirt and a sweatshirt over it. "What are you doing?!" her Mom said from the kitchen. "Stay here with us."
Mi-jeng explained her friend was having a hard time and she needed to see her right now.
"Don't bullshit me!"
Mi-jeng was stunned. I'm not. I have a friend. I have to help her. I--
"You never come around here. Today is a holdiay. Your Grandmother game from Jinju. Do you think that's easy for her?!"
Mi-jeng opened the door, ignoring what her mother had said. While it did effect her somewhat, in the sense that an older person had travelled a distance, her Grandmother's being that person did not effect her one way or another. Her grandmother watched her go out the door again with those same empty eyes. Probably, her grandmother's feeling was the same. Yes, this was her grandchild. She was leaving. But nothing beyond that.
"I'll be back in three hours," Mi-jeng said.
She ran out of the apartment building and looked for a taxi. On a holiday it might be hard to find one. She walked down the street. Her phone was ringing. It was Miss Ja. She kept walking. She walked under an overpass. The sky was hazy with so many cars trying to leave the city at once. Horn honked. Engines roared. Finally a taxi spotted Mi-jeng and honked at her.
When she sat down her phone vibrated through her purse and on the seat. She answered it.
"Are you almost there, dear?" Miss Ja was being very polite and nice to her. Uncharacterisitcally nice. It must be someone rich. It must be someone who can't go home for some reason and so they want to hang out with a nice girl during the holiday. Surely, Miss Ja didn't worry about pulling her from her holiday.
"I wanted to tell you that I think there are two clients, dear. And you can get paid double for that. Don't worry. Just be nice to them."
"Ok." Mi-jeng became conscious of her legs. She dove into her purse and located two aspirin and a package of Chinese herbs she'd gotten at the pharmacy.
"I'll call you later to see how you are. Remember to be nice, understand?"
"I understand."
"The apartment number is 1204."
"Ok." Mi-jeng collapsed her phone shut.
The taxi driver manuvered down several small side streets to avoid the traffic. Of course, other taxis, and other people did the same thing. Mi-jeng started out the window at the abnormally quiet streets. At the empty blue fish tanks. The unelectric neon lights. She held on to the door handle and the taxi driver whipped around corner after corner, finally reaching the Lotte Castle Apartments. She paid the driver.
The air was noticbly cleaner. Mi-jeng took a deep breath and walked a little slowly. Behind the apartments she could see the Gwanan Bridge and surrounding that, the ocean. The wind was cool, but pleasant.
She walked in building 12 and searched for water, finding a dispenser in the corner of the lobby. It was quiet. Her pills rattled against her teeth and she took a big gulp of water. She walked to the elevator and pushed the button. It beeped and made its way down. The doors opened and a family shuffled by in a hurry. The mother was pushing her two children by the back. She was wearing an expensive suit. The husband wore a golf shirt and slacks. The family looked like a commerical. All wearing nice, expensive clothes. The children were well fed. The daughter was even a little fat. The mother was dressed as nicely as the father. As the elevator door closed she watched the family run to a hired car. The door shut.
As she went to the 12th floor Mi-jeng thought about her grandmother again. Had she ever been in an apartment like this? Had she even seen one? What was she doing with this family was making all their money? What was her father doing? Why didn't she have this? Why didn't she deserve to live like this? She could feel the pills she took start to take hold. Her body was relaxed and almost didn't hurt.
She pushed the button on apartment 1204. An elderly man answered the door. He looked at her up and down. Mijeng's heart sank a little but she was careful not to show it. He looked to be about 65.
"Hello, please come in," he said jovially. "Would you like some coffee? I can see you didn't bring any yourself."
Mi-jeng laughed nervously. "I'm sorry sir. It's not a normal working day."
"That's ok," he said, "We have plenty of coffee here. Please sit down."
"Please, let me make the coffee sir."
"No no no," I can do it.
Mi-jeng sat on the leather sofa. She looked around the room. At the beautiful state-of-the-art TV on the opposite wall. It was huge. Outside the window was a beautiful view of the Gwanan bridge. The sun was shining bright and made the ocean a opulent shade of blue. The sun danced off the ocean. Mi-jeng looked around the room again. There were a couple of expensive looking sculptures. She looked in the kitchen again, hoping she had misjudged the man's age. Maybe he was 50. She looked at him from the back as he made the coffee. His wore a green striped robe. Maybe he's 50. He's the father of a family who left town. She looked around the room. A small jesa table was set up agains the wall. Some one store bought ceremonial food plates sat uneaten.
When he finished making the coffee and started to shuffle back toward her, carrying a tray with three cups of coffee. He looked as old as she'd originally thought. Even a little older. The skin under his chin flapped a little and he had liver spots on her face. He wore a silly little smile and grunted a little as he presented the coffee on the table next to Mi-jeng. "Here you are."
He sat next to her and stared at her. She pretended to ignore his stare and took another look around the apartment. She wondered where the other person was. When she looked back at the man he was starting at her legs. He abrubtly looked up at her.
"Did you enjoy your holiday?"
"Yes. Sir. My grandmother visited us from Jinju."
"Oh, good. That's nice."
"Did you have a nice Chusok sir?"
"Hmmm, yes. As you can see, there isn't much of a family here. My wife is dead and my son lives in the United States. I have two daughters, but they are with their husband's famlies in Seoul."
Mi-jeng nodded in agreement.
"My brother is here too. He's in the other room. This is his apartment. So I come here from Sassang to do Jesa. We did that early this morning."
Mi-jeng couldn't hear anyone else in the apartment. She looked back at the man. He had very kind eyes. The idea of having sex with such an old man disgusted her. But she'd done it before. As long as his body could function quickly it would be over fast and he'd probably give her a nice tip. She looked at his ears. They drooped down like sacks of sand. Mijeng finished her coffee. She noticed she had been quiet. She was failing in her role as hostess. She hadn't even gotten him the coffee.
"So, sir, what kind of work are you doing in Sassang?"
"I own a restarant. A raw fish restaurant."
"Oh, I love raw fish. So delicious."
He nodded. "It's sucessful. I've owned it nearly 15 years. My brother owns Miliak Beef House. Do you know it? It's one of the most famous restaurants in Busan."
Mi-jeng nodded, even though she didn't know it. She rarely ate at restaurants and had only been to Miliak once, to go to an amusement park with her boyfriend. They had planned to eat in Miliak that night, but he wanted to go a motel and have sex. But the motels in Miliak were too expensive. So they went to a DVD room. Even that was too expensive but he said "fuck it, lets go in," and they had. Mi-jeng had lost her virginity in Miliak. She had forgotten that until now. She wanted to laugh at the idea. She wished that bastard of a boyfriend could see her now. Having sex with a 65 year old man. Making more money in 1 hour than he could make in a 30 hour week.
Lost in her thought the man ran his finger up her bare arm. "You are very pretty. Tell me your name."
"Eun-sun."
"Oh, what a nice name." He let his finger come down her arm. He put his hand on her leg. It was starting. Soon he'd amble to take her shrit off, if he could manage to do it. She'd probably have to help him. Oh, this would be bad, she thought. She imagined his wrinkled body, flailing away on her. His riducilous pained with pleasure face. His occasially groping hands squeezing her breasts and then forgetting they were there. Please hurry, she said as his hands began to touch her stomach.
"Hey!" he yelled. "Older brother, are you in there? Are you coming here to see this beautiful girl?"
For a moment, so caught up in hoping it would all be over soon, she'd forgotten there was another person. Mi-jeng froze. Startled, and a little scared, she waited for an asnwer.
"Come in here," a tired voice said finally.
The man took her by the arm. "We should go in there," he pulled on Mi-jeng's arm a little hard. Not so much out of sheer force, but out of excitement, she knew. His robe rose slightly from an errection as he pulled her toward the room
It wasn't until they were half way across the room that she got around to contemplating that the man pulling her arm had called the man in the bedroom "older brother." Mi-jeng stared out the window at the beautuful view of the bridge and the blue ocean surrounding it until it was completely gone from her sight.